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Tuesday, October 19, 2010

There are many ways to skin a cat

Can you just imagine the mother that named her child Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde. I mean imagine shouting that from the top of the stairs when you are trying to get your child to pick up his dirty socks? Well, the lovely Mr. Wilde has been in bed with me for a few weeks now and I have to say I am glad to let him go this afternoon, as I wrap up a couple of huge assignments and send them on their merry way to the eager grading hands that await them.

This is what I have been staring at for the last few days. Blank pages of nothingness. Having to sit down and write two academic essays back to back, both due on the same day at the same time - well it is just madness.
The level of reading and interpreting and then writing and re-writing that has to occur before you get anywhere near what you actually (and finally) submit, are worlds apart. AND I did not even mention all the time that has to be spent complaining, procrastinating and fecking around on Facebook.
My English Literature classes this year revolve around 'Literature and The Renaissance' and 'Critical Theory and Practice'. Kill - Me - Now. Yes, I chose these classes. I picked the best of a very archaic lot. 

So where does all my Creative Writing get squeezed in to this year? Well, it is a struggle. We have just completed our first 'Poetry' session for Semester 1 and are hurtling right into the second half with a new Irish-Canadian poet named Celeste Augé. I am excited and a little terrified about the end result of a poetry semester. Don't get me wrong, I love to linger on the lines a little longer than most people, but know that making a living as a poet in Ireland is just not practical - therefore, I doodle, and I draw and I do not 'work like my life depends on it'. 

I have hit the mid-semester slump. It has just dawned on me that I have only 6 weeks of class left before the dreaded Christmas exams. Then only 12 weeks of class after Christmas. The academic year is slipping out of my hands and I still feel like I have just started back to college this week. I cannot get my groove on. I cannot buckle down and get stuck in. I am obsessed with the pile of laundry that gets bigger and bigger each week. Not so obsessed with 'doing the laundry' mind, just obsessed. I am frustrated that the kids still have not gotten themselves organized enough in the mornings to just get up, get dressed, eat breakfast and go to school without spilling something all over them selves, losing a shoe, or forgetting a lunchbox. 

I am overwhelmed at what it is to be a thirtysomething-mother-of-four going to college full time doing something that I love to do. Overwhelmed is a feeling I seem to be able to live with. 

I have learned to say:

when I know that I have too much on my plate. I have learned to NOT answer my phone when I am in the middle of doing my homework. I have learned to close FACEBOOK and not check into it five thousand times when I have deadlines looming. OK, maybe I do not actually shut FaceBook down completely - I mean, the rest of the world might not fully survive without my checking in for God's sake. Anyway, I am setting up these walls and boundaries all around me because something big is happening. Something great. Something rewarding. Something that is going to be an enormous challenge, an incredible experience, and someday, something really pretty to look at. 

Going back to school Going to University for the first time as as an adult is a very rewarding experience. I feel (on an almost daily basis) that the world is filled with possibilities and all we have to do is work hard to get what we want out of life. For those of you that are already "following" my blog, THANK YOU, I am humbled. For those of you that are silently stalking - stay tuned, and for those of you that just pop in occasionally and leave me random comments and funny messages - keep 'em coming! 

Those are all the WiseWords I have for today,



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